political post

Thank you

Julie left a comment here yesterday.. a personal comment about what her mother did. It is something that people tell me.. but sometimes I don't believe it. I know from my own experience that my mother wanted me to hate my father.. when they divorced.. she still can't say a good thing about him. She brings up the past over and over, but I have a good relationship with him now. He tells me that I am doing the right thing.. that I can only do what I can do. Sometimes it is hard to believe that the boys will react that way in the future.. that they will come up and hug me on their own.. without me having to hug them. I already feel that I have lost so much of thier childhood. I have a little movie that I made of the boys on the day that they left. Andy is smiling.. telling me that he loves me.. there are almost tears in his eyes.. then he shows me the coloring book that I got him.. he is coloring Spiderman... and then he points.. as if to say.. look at Alex.. and I turn the camera around and Alex smiles at me... happy.. but uncomfortable in front of the camera.. he shows me his train magazine and then looks out towards the tv in front of us... he is a little nervous about getting on the plane.. I move the camera towards the TV and shut it off. I remember that day..with tears in my eyes right now.. just how much they knew that I love them... and I wonder what is going to happen in October when they come back.. I know that it will be different.. now their mother has information about my house and Oklahoma.. information that she will use to bang over the boys heads so that when the come.. they will react differently. It was a special 5 weeks... something that I fought for.

I know people.. that don't talk to thier fathers... I ask them why and they tell me.. because, he never did anything for me... I hated going to his house in the summer.. becuase he re married and had children.. because my mother did everything for me and he never did his part... because he was never there.

that is what they tell me.. and I wonder about those fathers.. if they tried and tried.. or if they gave up at some point.. I don't know. I just know that I have to watch my little movies and photos more, to remember what it was like when the boys were here.




Political Comment

I watched the Democratic Convention and I have been also watching the Republican Convention. If you don't know.. I am voting for John Kerry.. and this comment is about what could have been. In watching the Republican convention, I see what the plan is for the Republicans, it is to take the country back to 9/12/01 the day after the United States was attacked. Do you remember how you felt that day? The skies were quiet, we were uneasy about going back to work (although I was out of work then) People were more polite, you didn't get cut off in traffic as much.. we came together as on country and for that matter the entire world came to the aid of the United States. The republicans waht to take us back to those days.. because that is when George W. Bush had a 81% approval rating. We ALL backed George Bush in those days.. back then (and remember this is less than 4 years ago) nobody would disagree with anything that the President said... Remember how the people of New York City didn't even honk their horns.. how the city became more peaceful? I remember how the country was outraged at Michael Moore for his comments during the Academy Awards and how the Dixie Chicks felt that they should apologize for one of their comments. I have to admit that back then, I wanted one America.. one UNITED nation that stood together and took care of each other... but what the republicans have shown me in the past two days is just how far we are from those days after September 11th... just how different it is today in New York City. I fear that if George W. Bush is re elected that the terrorist threat won't be only outside of the United States.. there are some people that angry enough... right here in the United States now.

What happened to our unity? What happened to that feeling that we all need to help each other? I know when it changed for me.. it was about midway through the Iraq war.. when the agenda changed from WMDs and removing Saddam to 'freeing the Iraqi people' and 'democratization of the world'

and... I felt duped.

I felt lied to, because I was a supporter.. because I watched the Humvee's charge into Iraq..."get that bastard, before he gets us"

So, when the Bush crew criicizes John Kerry for changing his mind.. I just wish that John Kerry would stand up and say... "damn right I changed my mind.. when I found out that the President of the United States was lying to the American Public, because about 1/2 of the country changed it's mind just like me"

Instead, the Democrats are on the defensive... they shouldn't be.. John Kerry should come out and say that he is proud of everything that he has said.. that sure, there have been times when he changed his mind.. a good leader is flexible.. and when there is "bad information from the CIA" it is a good time to change your mind.. or when you come back from Vietnam and you disagree with the war.. even though you did your part.. served your time.. and you should have the right in this country to say what you feel. Damn.. you tell me just one person that thought we did right thing in Vietnam?

I am ranting....

I wish that things had happened differently... wish that George W. Bush was the great Uniter that he promised he would be.. instead he is the great Divider.

George W. Bush... the Great Divider.. that is how he will be remembered in history. No matter who wins this election.. almost 50% of the people in this country will feel that they have lost.

That is sad.. considering how close we were back in the months after 9/11

Thanks for remdinging me... GOP... remidning me for the exact reason why I am not voting for Bush/Cheney...