Thank you

Thank you Karen, Gina, Guru and Kaydee and everyone that helps on a daily basis here. Some of you help me, because I read your blogs and realize that some of my difficulties just aren't that bad... and some make me realize that everything will work out.. there is one person out there that helps me understand how the boys may feel. I have so much love for my friends online... I don't need a therapist anymore :) Your words help me so much. The other day, I was very down because I called one of my best friends. She pretended to be happy for me. She knows me, and has met my boys. She told me that she couldn't really respond because she was jaded about the subject. You see, she has been raising her daughter alone for most of her life. I am not her ex husband.. not even close.. so I can't be compared... she knows that.. she was just surprised to hear that I may be leaving. I have not yet talked to my family about it. Nor has M told her parents. We want to wait until the offer is in and then let people know of our decision. I only have told few friends, because they are on my reference list.. and of course... I have told you :) I gave it a lot of thought and I am not doing anything wrong and I know the boys will understand. Their initial reaction will be to be upset... so many changes in their young lives, however I think that over the course of the next year, things will get better. I hope they will realize that the back and forth wouldn't have changed between their mother and I and I think that their lives will feel a bit more stable. I know that when they are with her, they are not mistreated unless they bring up something about me. They are both doing well in school and I know that it has nothing to do with me, except maybe my genes :)

Yes... Quality vs.. Quantity... thanks... it is so true.

I know that I shouldn't need validation, that I am old enough to make my own decisions. Now, it will be a very big joke if I don't get an offer for this new job. You see... I was thinking about it this morning. After my last interview... which was very difficult... I was told that there were 6 other people left to interview and then they would get back to me. They got back to me that afternoon.. and during that conversation, the guy that did the interview sort of joked around..."pretty tough huh?" and "after the first two interviews, you get lulled into a false sense of security" Now, I am really good at thinking about things and I have very good intuition. Would you say those things to someone that you were not going to offer the job to? Or, would you say those things to someone that you feel is close to coming on board and being a part of your team?

It looks good... and on top of everything, I will see my boys in a couple of days!

I wish I had more to talk about.. it has been so hot here, I won't miss this scorching heat... white hot.